Funny One Liners From Family Fighting
Share these quotes to finally prove yous're the funny ane in the family unit.
Funny quotes that perfectly sum upwardly your breed
Ah, family unit. We laugh together, cry together, and poke fun at one another whenever we get the chance. Being function of a family unit has its hilarious moments—some of which can merely be summed up through funny family quotes. Need a funny quote to share on social media or send in your family group chat? Look no further than this list of hilarious (and totally relatable) parents quotes, dad quotes, blood brother quotes, quotes almost mothers, and other family members.
General funny family quotes
ane. "Some family copse behave an enormous ingather of nuts."—Wayne Huizenga
2. "Equally a kid my family's carte consisted of two choices: take it or leave information technology."—Buddy Hackett
iii. "Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city."—George Burns
iv. "A family unit is a unit of measurement equanimous not only of children just of men, women, an occasional animal, and the mutual common cold."—Ogden Nash
5. "Patently, if I was serious nigh having a relationship with someone long-term, the concluding people I would introduce him to would be my family."—Chelsea Handler
6. "If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton, you may as well make information technology dance."—George Bernard Shaw
vii. "Nothing like watching your relatives fight, I always say."— The Lightning Thief
8. "I don't have to look up my family tree, because I know that I'm the sap."—Fred Allen
9. "The other night I ate at a real nice family restaurant. Every table had an argument going."—George Carlin
10. "Family ties mean that no thing how much you might want to run from your family, y'all can't."—Unknown
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Funny family quotes about kids
11. "Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them."—P.J. O'Rourke
12. "You know what it's like having five kids? Imagine y'all're drowning. And someone hands you a infant."—Jim Gaffigan
13. "I want my children to have all the things I couldn't beget. And so I desire to move in with them."—Phyllis Diller
fourteen. "When children are doing nothing, they are doing mischief."—Henry Fielding
15. "Children are a great comfort to us in our old historic period, and they assist united states of america achieve it faster, too."—John Ruskin
xvi. "Teach your kids to spend more time abrasive each other so they have less time to spend annoying you lot."—Unknown
17. "A ii-yr-old is kind of like having a blender, but you don't accept a top for it."—Jerry Seinfeld
eighteen. "When I tell my kids I'll practice something in a minute, what I'k actually saying is, "Delight forget.""—Unknown
19. "The reason I love kids so much is considering they're so honest, so you lot know right away if they like you or they don't."—Colin Egglesfield
20. "Having 1 child makes you a parent. Having two kids makes you lot a referee."—David Frost
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Funny family quotes well-nigh siblings
21. "Siblings that say they never fight are most definitely hiding something."— Horseradish
22. "I grew upwards with half dozen brothers. That's how I learned to trip the light fantastic—waiting for the bathroom."—Bob Hope
23. "Sisters never quite forgive each other for what happened when they were five."—Pam Brownish
24. "What brothers say to tease their sisters has nothing to do with what they actually think of them."—Esther Friesner
25. "Older siblings: the only people who will pick on you for their ain entertainment and trounce up anyone else who tries."—Unknown
26. "What foreign creatures brothers are!"—Jane Austen
27. "You can child the world, but not your sister."—Charlotte Grey
28. "Everyone knows that if you've got a brother, y'all're going to fight."—Liam Gallagher
29. "If you don't annoy your big sister for no skilful reason from time to fourth dimension, she thinks you don't dearest her anymore."—Pearl Cleage
xxx. "It was nice growing up with someone similar you—someone to lean on, someone to count on…someone to tell on!"—Unknown
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Funny family quotes most parents
31. "It'southward especially hard to acknowledge that you made a error to your parents, considering, of form, you know and then much more than they do."— The seven Habits Of Highly Effective Teens
32. "When your mother asks, "Do you lot want a piece of advice?" it's a mere formality. It doesn't matter if you answer yes or no. You're going to get information technology anyhow."—Erma Bombeck
33. "Have y'all e'er noticed how parents can get from the well-nigh wonderful people in the world to totally embarrassing in iii seconds?"— The Crimson Pyramid
34. "My father had a profound influence on me. He was a lunatic."—Spike Milligan
35. "Mother-daughter disagreements were, in retrospect, basically female parent stating the truth and daughter taking her own sweet fourth dimension coming around."—Barbara Delinsky
36. "Information technology's funny how your parents tell you information technology'southward their house, just as presently equally something needs cleaning, it magically becomes yours too."—Unknown
37. "My dad used to say, 'Always fight fire with fire.' Which is probably why he got thrown out of the fire brigade."—Harry Colina
38. "It'southward not like shooting fish in a barrel being a mom. If it were easy, fathers would practice it."—Betty White
39. "Respect your parents. These guys pay for your net."—Unknown
xl. "Parents must get across the idea that "I dearest you e'er, but sometimes I do not beloved your beliefs."—Amy Vanderbilt
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Funny family unit quotes about grandparents
41. "The reason grandparents and grandchildren get forth and so well is that they take a mutual enemy."—Sam Levenson
42. "My grandmother started walking five miles a twenty-four hour period when she was 60. She's 97 now, and we don't know where the heck she is."—Ellen DeGeneres
43. "To a small child, the perfect grandpa is unafraid of big dogs and tearing storms but absolutely terrified of the word "boo".—Robert Breault
44. "Grandparents are there to assistance the kid become into mischief they oasis't thought of yet."—Cistron Perret
45. "As I learned from growing upward, you don't mess with your grandmother."—Prince William
46. "A baby boy has a way of making a man out of his father, and a picayune male child out of his grandfather."—Angie Papadakis
47. "The best babysitters, of course, are the infant's grandparents. Y'all feel completely comfortable entrusting your baby to them for long periods, which is why most grandparents flee to Florida."—Dave Barry
48. "Grandmas don't just say "that's dainty"—they reel back and curl their eyes and throw up their hands and smile. Y'all get your money'south worth out of grandmas."—Unknown
49. "Every generation revolts against its fathers and makes friends with its grandfathers."—Lewis Mumford
fifty. "A female parent becomes a true grandmother the day she stops noticing the terrible things her children do considering she is so enchanted with the wonderful things her grandchildren do."—Lois Wyse
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Funny family quotes most spouses
51. "The secret of a happy union remains a secret."—Henny Youngman
52. "Marriage is a human relationship in which one person is always right, and the other is the husband."—Unknown
53. "Backside every slap-up man is a woman rolling her eyes."—Jim Carrey
54. "The man who says his wife tin can't take a joke, forgets that she took him."—Oscar Wilde
55. "My married man thinks I'm crazy, only he'due south the i who married me."—Unknown
56. "I love beingness married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the residuum of your life."—Rita Rudner
57. "Marriage is not just spiritual communion, it is also remembering to accept out the trash."—Joyce Brothers
58. "Most of a hubby's life is spent in doing research on his married woman."—Pawan Mishra
59. "Marriages are made in heaven. Just so over again, are thunder and lightning."—Clint Eastwood
60. "Husbands and wives are irritating. Merely without them, who would we blame for misplacing our socks?"–Janet Periat
Still need some laughs later on browsing this list? Check out the funniest quotes of all time!
Source: https://www.rd.com/article/funny-family-quotes/
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